Excerpt #10: Shame

     Our mother just couldn't stand the thought of anyone in our family accomplishing anything worthwhile, academic achievement or anything else that warranted praise. 

I've never been able to figure out why my mother felt that way about pride and achievement, but she did. Everyone who hung around our place learned to see themselves as unworthy; it just kind of "rubbed off." Even at the age of fourteen I knew it was crazy, but I could never come to terms with it. It never settled right with me, but over time, shame somehow got into my very being and the only way to go was...hangdog! My mother initiated the defeated persona I would come to adopt, but it was my father who put the finishing touches on me.